Friday, August 5, 2016

Jude is 3!

I can't believe this sweet boy is three years old today.  Jude is so sweet and fun!  He is a 'big' boy in a little body.  He keeps right up with his 6 and 7 year old brothers.  He loves all dogs.  He is obsessed with Paw Patrol and he is such a good big brother to Joseph and baby Joel in my tummy.  I am so blessed to get to be Jude's mommy.  Jude plays a special role in our family.  Being life after the loss of Joshua we have defiantly cherished every second of these 3 years like we hadn't before.  
Happy Birthday JUDE!

It's been a long time...

Wow!  I knew I hadn't blogged in a while but I didn't realize it had been almost a year!  So much to catch up on in this last year.  With a house full of boys we have been busy and I have relied on my instagram account to keep up with day to day memories.   If you instagram click on the camera to the right to follow us there.

Last year after a lot of prayer and discernment Nathan and I decided to pull the boys out of school to homeschool.  If you know me you know this was a very hard decision and something I had always said I would never do.   Well I've learned, never tell God you will never do something!  So we took a leap of faith and started the homeschool life.  Last year James was in First grade and John Patrick in Kindergarten.  I won't say it was perfect or that I didn't have moments of what did I get myself into!  But we survived and overall it was a huge blessing for our family.  Homeschooling isn't for everyone and I think there will come a time when it isn't for us either but for now it works.  I love getting to be with my kids day in and day out.  I love getting to see their faces as they learn something new or accomplish a goal.  I love our little ones getting to be together with their big brothers.  I love having less stressful evenings because we finish all of our work durning the day.  I love seeing James and John Patrick become even closer than before.  I love having time to read to my kids when we aren't all exhausted.  I love getting to go to daily mass with the boys.  And so many more blessings that homeschooling brings.  So last year I focused on the good and we made it through our first year.  Fast forward and here we are in August again and we are about to start First grade and Second grade year.  Being a former teacher there is something so special about getting to prepare a classroom, a curriculum, a schedule for my own kids.  When I think about starting back I get a lump in my throat and my stomach churns.  It's scary.  I get scared of not being enough, not teaching the right things, not keeping my patience, basically just messing up these beautiful children God has entrusted to me.  But when I stop and say I'm not enough and give it all to God, then I am able to breath and move forward.  As always I welcome any prayers :)  If anyone wants specifics on curriculum we use of books of wisdom that have helped me along the way I'd love to share them with  you so just write me a comment below.

Ok so what else is new.   We are expecting!  We are thrilled that God has blessed us with another child to raise in this world.  Baby number six will be here in early November!   Having 4 boys here on earth and one in heaven we don't take pregnancy for granted and are so thankful for a healthy baby.  We are thrilled to share that God has blessed us with another precious boy!  Joel Anthony.  We have known we were expecting a boy for months but it took me a while to feel comfortable sharing the gender with the world.  Family and friends know that we are not 'trying for a girl' and are truly thrilled and honored to be blessed with a sixth boy.  However, the world sees things differently and its hard to convey to strangers that we are, open to life, open to God's will, and trust God to determine what our family looks like.  It's hard to hear the comments for myself but also because I have little ears listening and I don't want any of my boys to ever feel like they were not wanted or prayed for.  The pity I see in peoples eyes when they find out we are expecting another boy breaks my heart.   Do not pity me.  I have been blessed beyond measure and could not be more excited.  I know there are women who struggle with infertility or who have lost children.  I know I am not worthy of having so many blessings.  I also know we have a Joshua sized hole in our hearts and we know how precious life is.  So we are having a boy and we are over the moon!

Hopefully I will be able to get myself back into a routine of blogging.  I like having it to look back on and see how my kids have grown throughout the years.  I am not a writer and as I write I have kids pulling at my legs and asking for food from the other room so please excuse any errors in my post.  :)